One day I went for a sail

One day I went for a sail
The boat started flooding with water
Opps, someone's left the toilet water valve wide open

One day I went for a sail
It was blowing real hard. then the mainsail split in half
Opps, it must have done more than a 100,000 miles

One day I went for a sail
It had been a tough 48 hours, but we found the forepeak all full of water
Opps, the on deck hatch hadnt been closed hardly at all

One day I went for a sail
Emergency below, someones vomiting blood and bits of red foam
Opps, too many drinks the night before a stonking run down to the Horn

One day I went for a sail
The day was fine, and the spinnaker went up
Opps, it had to come down real fast as it was upside down by the ass

One day I went for a sail
Flying along with the sails wing on wing
Opps, quick call the skipper, the spinnaker pole has just broken in half

One day I went for a sail
Ocean days with really bumpy seaways, somethings banging on deck
Opps, one forestays broken in half, and is flapping up round the mast

One day I went for a sail
Someone went to the heads and is really taking their time
Opps, bit hard to pump the centre of toilet rolls down a small tube

One day I went for a sail
Nice smooth day for a sail, the boats moving well, how could this be so, it
was meant to blow
Opps, smart ass crew changed the course by 60 degrees

One day I went for a sail
There was a thump and a bump, then the blood started rushing out.
Opps, someone forgot to do up there bunk lee cloth and their heads taken a
great knock

One day I went for a sail
With a wave and a cheer we pulled out from the pier, then a bigger cry was
then heard
Opps, forgot to unplug the shore power electricty

One day I went for a sail
It was calm and it was clear, a gently breeze came through the trees
Opps, no opps for us this day it was just perfect